Parashat Lech Lecha ~ October 31, 2009 ~ 13 Cheshvan 5770
(Words to Taylor Kaufman, on the occasion of her Bat Mitzvah)
In your d’var torah and in our discussions with one another, we spoke about the significance of names and how they shape who we are. In Jewish tradition it is customary for us to give our children the names of those who have left this world for the world beyond this one, in an attempt to give the ones whom we cherished in life a sense of immortality. Even though they might not be living any longer, the character of who they were lives inside each of us who bear their name. Taylor, you spoke eloquently about the significance of your names even though you doubt that you carry with you much of the past. All I can say to you, Taylor, is wait. In time, the meaning of these things will be revealed to you.
Let me offer you an example from my own life. My middle name is Jacob. I knew that I must have asked my mother about the significance of this name at least a hundred times, each time that I needed to complete a homework assignment regarding a family tree, because the name “Jacob” never appeared on that list. When I was in Israel, the importance of that name became apparent to me when we were visiting the Theodore Herzl museum that is located on the grounds of the military cemetery in Jerusalem where he sits for eternity along with Israel’s “giborim” – military heroes who gave their lives to protect the State of Israel – and her government leaders. It was by the grave of Theodore Herzl that my mother mentioned that the middle name that was given to me was to honor the memory of Jacob Pollack, an uncle on her mother’s side whom she never knew. Jacob Pollack was a Hebrew tutor for Theodore Herzl when he and his family were living in Vienna. Even though no written record has been found to verify the truth to this family story, just the thought of having a familial connection to the founder of the dream to a Jewish State fills me with an even greater sense of pride in carrying forward his name. I am a teacher, just like Jacob.
Many times the name that we bear increases in value in this world when we invest it with new meaning through our own actions. Building your own name is just as important, if not more so than taking on a name of the past. Building a name for yourself takes time and dedication, and patience and perseverance. As God says to Abraham, this is how you shall bring blessings into this world.
In thinking about the significance of Abraham’s journey through life and through the ancient world of Mesopotamia and how he created a name for himself and the Jewish people as “Iv’rim” – “Those who cross over”, I came across a trailer to a short documentary that is gaining in notoriety as it makes its way through various e-mails. It is a film about some people who live in Bangor, Maine that are inspiring others by “crossing over” their personal difficulties in life to give meaning to a select group of young men and women. In the trailer, there is an elderly gentleman who actually says, “My life don’t mean much to me. However, if it gives meaning to another human being, that is my life endeavor.”
The documentary is entitled “The Way We Get By.” It is the story, so I am told, of a group of elderly men and women in Bangor, Maine. There is nothing extraordinary about these people. According to others who have reviewed the film, some of the people mentioned live in homes overrun by cats and their debris. Others are more middle class. Some are healthy; others are battling cancer, heart disease, and other debilitating diseases that come with aging. Some are married; others are widowed. Some have pets such as a dog; others live alone. Taylor, given their age, these are very ordinary seniors who have lived a full life filled with many experiences, who have come to a point in their lives when they doubt the name that they have created for themselves as they search for meaning as the end of their days approach. And they have found that source of meaning in a very simple act that is documented in this movie.
They are united in a single purpose, a goal that they have discovered for themselves that creates a bond with one another through a shared experience. What is the simple act that unites them in such and extraordinary way, you may ask? It so happens that Bangor is one of the primary airports for the departure and arrival of American troops as they head off to or return from war in Iraq and Afghanistan. This group of committed citizens meets at the airport, at any time of day or night, when they learn that a plane of soldiers is departing or arriving. They come to wish them well when they depart and to greet them home when they arrive.
Even though they may have varying political opinions about America’s involvement in the Middle East in Iraq and Afghanistan, they set aside their differences when it come time to welcoming the troops and the need to support the brave men and women who serve in the United States Military.
It is not uncommon for them to receive a phone call at midnight in the middle of winter when the temperature is still dropping, and the voice at the other end says, “There’s a flight coming in at 2:45 AM.” To these unique seniors, it really doesn’t matter what the hour is, nor the weather. It is Maine, after all! Despite the fact that each of these individuals have their own aches and pains, and they have their loneliness and their doubts, and their financial struggles – they brave the frigid temperatures in the middle of winter to be at the airport in time.
When they get there, they come with their smiles, to offer hugs, and to say their thanks – and to share cell phones and cookies for the weary travelers. What gives their life meaning is the ability to offer their gratitude! This is the power of giving, a life style that you are beginning as you enter your own adulthood, Taylor.
These people who come to greet the soldiers do not have graduate degrees. Nor do they need them to know the impact that they are making with each new plane that they greet. They know on a deeper level than most of us, that as givers, it is they who are receiving the greater gift. It is sad when a person comes to the end of life and feels as though they have not accomplished much or that their current level of activity has relatively little meaning in comparison to their more productive years. Yet, they discover the importance of making a name for themselves despite the depravity of their current lives, because they know that through their giving they bring blessing to others who need it more than they do, in their estimation.
In Judaism we talk a lot about putting one foot in front of another – lekh lekha – going out into the world in order to make our names great. We speak about the importance of remembering those who are less fortunate than ourselves and the need to do good in this world, to being hospitable in the same way that Abraham and Sarah opened their tent to strangers. Perhaps it is not a coincidence that your Bat Mitzvah, Taylor, falls on the same date as USA WEEKEND Magazine celebrates its 19th Anniversary of Make a Difference Day (October 24). According to their web-site, “Millions have participated. In 2008, 3 million people cared enough about their communities to volunteer on that day, accomplishing thousands of projects in hundreds of towns.”
In my reading a review of this movie, what I have discovered is something that I have always known, but at times have taken for granted. It doesn’t take an extraordinary individual to make a difference in this world. Sometimes a simple handshake can make all the difference in a person’s life. What this community in Bangor, Maine teaches us is that they saw a need and they filled it – not for fame, not for glory, nor for recognition, not because this is what they dreamed about doing all their lives. What they show us in the simple act of baking cookies and offering hugs, and a handshake is the awesome act that they care. Just maybe they are not so average after all.
Taylor, I look at you on this day and I see the potential that is within your heart and your soul and your capacity to give to others. Like Abraham and Sarah, whose names were made great by the deeds that they performed, you, too, will bring blessing to yourself and to your family with the things that you do and accomplish in life. Your work with the Northeast Animal Shelter is just the beginning to a lifetime of mitzvoth and tzedakah and gemilut chesed, a lifetime of honoring your responsibilities to give to those less fortunate than yourself, and to bring light into the hearts of others through not only charitable acts but the giving of your time and yourself. Given your interest in animals, I have taken the liberty of adopting a cat, a snow leopard to be more exact, in your honor. Her name is Tang and she can be found at the Franklin Park Zoo. With this certificate you have visitation rights, although I don’t know if she can come home with you.
